Self Portrait Tuesday

This months theme is time. I have searched for a description of the time theme on the SPT blog but haven’t found one, so I’ll do my own thing with the idea of time.
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Josiah asked me what was on the tree. The buds on the dogwood have been getting bigger and more noticeable. I pulled the branch down for him to see. He asked what they were and I said they would become flowers. He then tried to pull at the sides of the buds to get to the flower. It teases you with it’s bumpy center just whispering that it’s there. No wonder Jos wanted to pull back at the shell. I found myself saying, “No Josiah, you can’t force it open, you have to let the flower grow.” There are so many things you can allude to with that phrase. I could reflect on how I want to get moving on our dreams faster, how I can’t stand this waiting period. Although I must say the spring weather makes your brain hurt a lot less about change. I could reflect on art and how it takes time to produce mature work. I feel I have just barely scratched the surface of being a mature artist. Sometimes I create great works. Most of the time I create OK works. And some that never get seen, or never get sold are bad works. I could remember that art is something that takes time and it can’t always be pushed into a deadline. Even though some of my best art has come from a healthy pressure. I could reflect on my children and how I have to let them grow. I have to challenge them along with myself. I have to give them my time to become the people they need to be. I have to give them knowledge of Our Savior through not just my silent prayers but with my public worship. I have to be intentional about their learning things like letters, numbers, sounds, how to relate, how to respond, and how to create things without destroying. And there we make a full circle, “No Josiah, you can’t force it open, you have to let the flower grow.” But it’s a message to me too. I can’t force things to happen I have to wait and enjoy the journey everyday. Every single day.
Some lyrics from one of our familys favorite albums these days, House Party by Dan Zanes:
the trees are my friends
they offer up their limbs
to shade me from the sun
and whisper with the leaves on the wings of the breeze

and the breeze is my friend
it sings me a song
and carries along
the melody of the birds and the trees
and the birds are my friends
they chirp and they warble
they remind me to be cheerful
even when their wings are wet with the rain
i’m surrounded by friendship
and all i have to do is look around and see where my friends may be
oh don’t you know they’re everywhere
and the rain is my friend
it fills up my cup
to quench my thirst
so that i’ll be relieved when the sun shines again
and the sun is my friend
it warms me again
it winks and laughs with me
as it reaches down through the leaves on the limbs of the tree


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