A Hater

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There needs to be another 5 hours in the day. Or in the night. I seem to have to sacrifice sleep, well mostly sleep, to be able to create the littlest pieces of art. What do I do if I want to work on something more involved? Bigger? Something I can’t hold in my lap while I’m watching ‘The Dog’? I feel I need to dedicate some serious time to my serious persuits. There just isn’t enough time. And when I do sink alot of time into something it comes out not looking right or not selling. Bleah. I wish I was a photocopy machine that could just produce 10 of the same thing and then I’d have a few hundred bucks in my pocket. Staring down house-fixing debt is scary and $50 here and there doesn’t do much at all except remind me that I want to make art. All the time. But I have to love on my kids and my husband and not be a hermit. I have to go to work when I’m needed. I have to make lesson plans, which I haven’t felt very prepared for recently. I have to fax this and that for different real estate things. And I have to dedicate time to the kind parents who are housing us by helping clean and have those ‘middle of the hall’ conversations that don’t happen when it’s just you. (Maybe some of you do have those conversations with yourself and in those conversations refer to yourself in the third person as “mama” and if so, I don’t blame you one bit! i.e.”Mama needs a Coffee ASAP!”) Today I am recovering from working on this *&%$# bird tha just won’t look right. 1am has never been so disappointing. I got the funk, the blues, that revolve around so much opportunity (which I am very thankful for) yet goes unsatisfied. I want to be fair and kind to my family and not take this out on them, so here you go blogland! I am thrilled with the things God has put in my path, now I just have to figure out the time management.
We’re making a quick trip to Marietta today to check on the house, pick up art and paperwork, and go to Whole Foods (oh how I miss Thee). Maybe if I tire myself out enough I’ll forget about productivity at all and even stop checking my email! Erfff.
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My 1am WIP.


One thought on “A Hater

  1. ernie

    I actually like how this one is going. But isn’t that how it goes? The paintings you are unsure about are the ones everyone likes, and the ones you feel best about are the ones everyone else is unsure about. Or maybe it’s just me.

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