Maybe I am a really bad driver. Maybe I should just let Joel drive everywhere. Maybe be a Stay-At-Home-Mom that stays at home is a good idea. Because I had a car accident last month that totaled my beloved Prev. Today, sheesh, I didn’t have an accident. I cut someone off. Totally on accident and I checked my mirrors and everything. It was just one of those “Oh, crap! My blind spot!” moments. Am I alone in this experience? Do the rest of you guys not have these accidental highway no-no’s? Well, the person I cut off obviously was not happy with me and was not just going to give me the finger and drive away. They got in front of me and slowed down to 40mph. Whatever, I know, if that makes you feel better, go ahead. Then I got off at the wrong exit because I was flustered and not thinking. They cut over too and drove very slowly down the off ramp. Then, they stopped. Dead stopped in the middle of the off ramp! Cars went whizzing by their little Nissan Sentra. I sat in the car going, “No! This is not a good idea!” I know I was wrong, and I did cut them off. I really didn’t mean to! They got out and confronted me. I rolled my window down a half inch. I locked my doors. Many F-bombs were dropped by the people I had wronged. The grandma in the sweater vest was particularly strange using that colorful language. I wasn’t even thinking about what I had done to them because we were in jeopardy of getting smooshed by the eleven hundred other folks getting off the highway! “I know! I’m very sorry! I didn’t mean to! But please! We have to move our cars! This is not smart AT ALL!” I abandoned all sense of actually feeling bad for these people because obviously their anger had completely overcome their sense of reason. When the dude went back to his car (I think he realized that the next shiny white Caddy could take off the doors that he had left open. Both sides, were open. Yeah.) The grandma said that I shouldn’t be on the road. Maybe she’s right. I remember that last time I was pregnant I came face to face with road rage for the first time. Then she said she was going to get my plates. That’s when I left. I’m not sticking around for that. I’m sure the police are going to be glad to know that you blocked one of the busiest exits in East Brainerd to chew out a fellow driver. The funny thing is, our bike rack is a permanent installment on the back of our car. We have no where else to put it and we use it at least twice a week. You can’t read the numbers with that rack on! Especially when the car isn’t sticking around!
But it was a moment that I was not proud of. I was very bothered when I realized I cut them off. And the circumstances that they chose to confront me just made me distracted from my wrong doing. It makes me think that it’s not easier to drive places to be entertained. And it makes me realize that I am powerless against my wrongs. Waiting on someone else’s forgiveness is painful and humbling. It makes me realize that some people cannot handle anger, or being wronged. They can only react in one way. I hope that I remember to react in a way that reflects Jesus. I don’t think I did that today, I wasn’t sensitive but I wasn’t insulting. I said I was sorry a buncha times. But I did not make those people my focus. And they should have been my focus.
I had to calm Josiah down, he was all worked up over the experience. I had to explain why the man was so mad. I had to find a place to pull over and talk to the kids and keep my hands from shaking.
A lot of hub-bub for something that I can’t change.