a Good Papa

medium n large, originally uploaded by katiek2.

I want to give my husband as much time with his family that is stress-free. I also want to give him time to “be with the guys” or pursue things that are hard to do with the kids, like small group for instance. God is so good to me to give me Joel. In these past 11+ years of marriage things haven’t always been easy. I think the ten year mark was difficult, a lot of stuff started getting in the way of our relationship. I had lots of time where I felt insecure, that I would never be what Joel wanted me to be. We can only rely on God to keep our marriage going. Marriage is dying to yourself, and being a parent you die a little bit more. I realize that whether you have these relationships in your life or not, you are supposed to die to yourself and live for Christ. Having all these people in my house with me just remind me faster. Another reason I recommend these decisions very much. Get yourself a spouse, and some little ones!
I’ve had a lot going on recently. And when I have to leave Joel with the kids over and over I start to feel that it’s too much. I really want him to not need to do it all. As much as parenting is a partnership, I don’t think he needs to worry about the home management stuff that I do daily. A meeting here, a special event there, a school function and then Joel takes the big kids camping. I’ve had a lot of time away lately. Because I don’t expect Joel to do anything extra besides just love on his kids and make sure they’re taken care of, I figure I’ll come home to a gross house with no homework done and nothing put away. But Joel has been stellar. His camping trip with the kids was great, and he put away all the stuff after. Last night I had a meeting for Our Clothesline Art Show and I came home to plenty of dishes, but Joel did so much homework with Josiah. Wow. It made me sigh with joy and relief. I happily did dishes, made lunches and folded laundry until 12:30am.
Not only was the homework done, but Joel is involved and cares about Josiah’s math studies especially. Which is good, because I’m hopeless at math. He has stepped in with discipline with the big kids and defends me and my authority  . I love deferring to his authority. It also helps that he is much taller than I am, Josiah’s catching up to me fast! He has really grown into a man who understands fatherhood and it pulses through his veins.
He has been teaching the lesson at Kids Church, and he communicates really well. I’m proud to be his partner as we lead the children together. He has a dream of going overseas and doing a teaching English programs. At first I was trying to accommodate his dream through clenched teeth, but I think he would be awesome at it. God has shown Joel favor at his job, and God has shown favor to me to give me such a great partner.
I look forward to the years of adventure ahead. Those of you that know Joel, you’ll agree he’s pretty cool.


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